To be a proper mummy.
To do the school run without feeling like I’m going to fall apart.
To sit through a Sunday service without crying.
To stop being such a bloody great big burden on my friends.
To sleep for a whole night through.
To be able to hold my head high when talking to the children’s teachers.
To feel like I am good – or even just okay – at my job.
To stop wanting to hurt myself.
To be able to keep tablets in the house without temptation.
To go to the shop and be able to walk past the medicine shelf without a second thought.
To stop feeling guilty
To laugh.
To not have secrets.
To be able to say no, I’m not okay, please help me.
To never have to call an ambulance again.
To stop pretending.
To be a good friend, not the one everyone wishes they had never met.
To not need medication.
To need medication but be okay on it.
To have a family day out without feeling I will break.
To be able to talk to my parents without hiding.
To stop wearing long sleeves.
To want to live, not die.
To be well.
More than anything.
To be well.
Lucy's Depression Diary 